Saturday, June 25, 2011

Movie Reviews By My Kid: KUNG FU PANDA 2

My four year old is opinionated  (I have no idea where she gets this from).  Here are her thoughts on Dreamworks Annimation's latest feature:
Kung Fu Panda is 1hr and 31min.  It's classified as Action/Adventure/Family.  

Did you like Kung Fu Panda?
No way.

Why not?
Because it was like fire hoya- sing.  I did not like it.

Can you elaborate?
It was like firing balls, shooting to the baby and then like the bear went hoy-a! because he didn’t want to get fired.

What do you mean he didn’t want to get fired?
There was fire balls.  The mean pirates were trying to fire Kung Fu Panda.

Did you like anything about the movie?
No.  I said get out here Dadda.  Get out here!

What would make it better?
If I was brave.
What do you mean?
I don’t know.  I liked the good part.
What’s the good part?
It's...that...(pause) when Kung Fu Panda was in his home family.  
Anything else you want to say?

How many stars would you give this movie?

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

My Family Vacation Photo

I just lost hours of my life.  I decided to press the "next blog" link at the top of this page and found myself lost in the abyss of Bloggerdom.   I came across one blog with hundreds of travel photos this woman had taken along with captions about how her life was perfect.  As I clicked deeper into her blog and photo journal (yes, I started to feel like a stalker) I found myself searching for at least ONE photo where her and her husband had a hair out of place.  Come on!  Surely one of you got the runs in Mexico?   Or you got a little too drunk at your wedding?  Nothing.  They were indeed the two most perfect looking people I've ever seen in my life.  There is no doubt in my mind that they iron everything.  So this photo is for those of you who might have clicked on "next blog" and found my site.  The below photograph was taken by my husband because I wanted at least one photo of me and my girls in Cuba.  There is nothing staged in this picture.  It's just my life.  Enjoy.  Oh, and don't buy armless sunglasses.  They don't work.

Friday, June 17, 2011

Random Acts of Awesomeness

There are some days that, no matter what happens, you assume are going to be bad.  I recently had one of these days.   I woke up with a golf ball sized pimple nestled right under my nostril.  One of those immensely painful zits that most likely started to form way back in 1986 and has taken this long to see the light of day.  Trust me, I'm not one to talk about pimples, I rarely get them, but when I do you can spot it from a helicopter.   I tend to spend the day being so focused on the new inhabitant on my face that most people assume there is something seriously wrong with me.  I try and keep it to myself out of fear that the person I'm talking to might have cancer and think my zit preoccupation qualifies me for asshole of the year.

For me any sort of break out is usually stress related.  I have often thought how handy it would be to have some sort of hormone detector at my door that I could insert my finger into and know how to proceed with my day, like:

"Red Alert!  Do NOT,  under any circumstance,  press send on ANY emails today that begin with,  "Dear F@#kface..."

But unfortunately I just need to gage my own mood, or possibly take my husband's reactions into account.  I guess.

So that's how my day started.  How my day ENDED was a whole other story.  If you haven't read my previous blog: you may want to check it out, because what happened next is kind of awesome.   (Okay, here's where I assume you're going to go read the blog and come back to this post.  I will wait for you.  I promise.)

I sent that blog to the artist because if I didn't buy his painting the least I could get from the situation was a good story.  He responded that "he would make it up to me".  I thought this was sweet because really,  he could just assume I'm a psycho who clearly can't let things go.  Fortunately he didn't make this assumption (He has never seen me play cards.  How could he know?).   Instead he sends me a message that he "has something for me".  Let me reiterate - we are complete strangers and I didn't for one second think he was "going to make it up to me".  The only thing he knows about me is that I'm a bit of a cry baby and I LOVED his fox painting on a core level (note - I do not cry when I play cards).  Of course, as fate would have it, we are practically neighbours.  When he arrives at my house he pulls out a framed, signed, print of the Fox.  The print is signed 1/1 so I will be the only person to ever have a print of my delightful fox (yes, Juice-bar man, you heard me).   This is a gift.  Why?  Why you ask?  Why would this artist spend his own money to give me a beautifully framed print?  For one reason, and one reason only:

He's Awesome.  And perhaps he knows that almost on a daily basis I will look at my fox and be very, very, happy.   Chances are, I wouldn't even notice if I had a gigantic painful zit.  I'm sure he noticed mine though (how could he not?) but he said nothing, nor spoke to it directly.

So Richard Ahnert.  You're Random Act of Awesomeness did not go unnoticed.  You completely changed my day (my week!) and reconfirmed my belief that art is more powerful than anyone gives it credit for.  I truly believe you're going to be famous.  Not only because you're are a profoundly gifted artist but because you're just a really great person with a big heart.  Your mother must be proud.  Please send her this post and tell her I'm sorry I used the "f" word.

So check out Richard's website at:

Now I must go stare at my most awesome Mr. Fox...